The tribute to Jacob Hamblin on Thursday, July 17, was a mixed bag. The guest of honor, Jacob Hamblin, long since deceased, was well worth any honor bestowed upon him.

He was a rugged frontiersman, a fearless man of God, a peacemaker, and a truth teller who was trusted by the Indians as few white men were…before and after!

He carved a niche in the annals of history that is brighter today than it was at the time he hacked his name in stone for the ages. He was a man for all seasons.

Those paying tribute? Now, that’s a horse of a different color. First there’s Sam Jackson. Sam, who wrote your stuff? You couldn’t write a grocery list.

Laurali Noteman, you’re becoming as sickingly-sweet as Myrna Cox. Luckily, Myrna wasn’t there. The two of you together on stage at the same time! Scary! We’d all have been knee deep in Karo syrup and powdered sugar cake frosting.

Leon Christiansen says he used to know all the words to 10,000 songs. Now, he says he knows a few words to possibly 10 songs. Mind deteriorating, Leon? Well, friend, your voice is still mellow, even if you had the Red River Valley in the Virgin Islands and you were riding along “Deep in the heart of Kansas.”

Doug “Mumbles” Keller, you don’t have a frog in your throat. You have a giant, wooly caterpillar! Your throat must look like the inside of a giant fur ball. To call you gravel voice would be an insult to every chunk of rock west of the Appalachian Mountains.

Dennis Judd, you couldn’t emcee a Tiddley Wink contest. Where did you steal that western garb? From Doug Keller’s rejects…and Doug Keller always looks like he was dressed in Deseret Industries’ throwaways!

Ol’ Crankcase, the less said about you the better. You wouldn’t have been a part of “How The West Was Won”... you would have been a part of “How the West was Lost!”

Jacob Hamblin, you were a man for the ages. Tribute crew, you aren’t a group for day after tomorrow…but Ol’ Crank loves you, anyway.